Christian Living, church

Concern for the Contemporary Church

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bell tower

I am a “retired” pastor. I placed the word “retired” in quotation marks (twice now) because I am still trying to discern what that word means. Mr. Webster supplies some helpful hints, but they tend not to correspond to my current life. Did I mention that I recently turned eighty? I did. One of my former catechism students from Canada wrote me happy birthday wishes and asked what it felt like to be eighty. I responded that it felt a lot like seventy only older. I’m not certain that helped her.

One thing I have noticed is that with all the emphasis placed on youth in America in our time, once you turn seventy or so, people think of you as too old for anything, including preaching and teaching. It’s the age number that is hard for people to overcome.

Stating the Problem

I must admit that I do get a lot more reading done these days, which brings me to the reason I am writing this blog post. A youngish Christian recently wrote about some of the serious problems in the contemporary church setting, among which was a deplorable lack of ethical discernment and reflection. I agree wholeheartedly. The young man formulated his concern in the form of a question: “How do most Americans get training in ethical reflection?” By extension, we might ask, “Where do serious-minded Christians go to learn how to make God-pleasing ethical decisions?” Certainly, home is an option for ethical instruction, but the local congregation ought to be as well.

Granted, there are—thankfully—still Christian congregations where the congregants are challenged by excellent expository preaching and Sunday School classes that are challenging and informative. In the twenty-first century, however, many of those local churches are assigned to the “endangered species” list. With the advent of the homeschooling phenomenon, some parents have taken the time to ensure that their children receive a thorough grounding in mature Christian decision-making, along with catechetical instruction that provides a solid outline of the essential, fundamental doctrines of the Christian faith. In addition, there are still Christian high schools that offer courses—as in “more than one”—in ethics, but they, too, are becoming increasingly rare. Not to teach our youth Christian ethics and worldview is spiritually to shortchange them. Exposure to the twenty-first-century world is a dangerous and hostile undertaking.

It would be a sheer novelty to locate a state college or university that provided any formal ethical instruction, but assuredly all of the secular institutions of “higher learning” teach/indoctrinate their students in the secular version of ethics. On second thought, it would be a near miracle to find such courses in our locales. Approximately fifty or so years ago, H.L. Mencken famously quipped that “there is no idea so stupid that you cannot find a professor who will believe it.” While that is meant to be mildly humorous, there is more than a modicum of truth enveloped in it.

When I speak or write about the contemporary Church of Christ, I am generally referring to what we witness results of the mega-church, emergent/emerging church, Social Justice Warrior, and woke congregations from the early 1970s until the present and their various combinations and permutations. In my forty-five years of pastoral ministry in three different countries (The Netherlands, Canada, and the United States) I have surmised that we are facing at least three generations of professing Christians that have not been fed the spiritual food they and we all so desperately need.

What I have observed is that a growing number of professing Christians, young, older, and very much older, have not received much or any substantive training in how to think about ethics and ethical issues. Every two years, Ligonier Ministries conducts a theological survey focused on the beliefs of those who are avowed “evangelicals” and who attend worship on a regular basis. Yearly, the results of that survey increase in their disheartening results. Understanding of rudimentary Christian truth/doctrine deteriorates yearly, followed closely by deviations from what ought to be easily discernible ethical reflection. It is noteworthy that views on abortion on demand, homosexuality, transgenderism, economics, politics, and worldview—just to mention a few—trend in a disturbing direction. The obvious danger for the Church is that if contemporary, popular churches continue to ignore serious ethical reflection, congregants will continue to be molded and shaped by a culture that is openly hostile to Christianity.

Returning to the notion of schools for a moment, especially Christian high schools, there needs to be a greater emphasis on Bible, the formation of a biblical life and worldview, languages, the fine arts, and ethical decision-making using the Ten Commandments as Christian Ethics 101, whether it is a strictly homeschool situation, a homeschool co-op, or a regional Christian high school. In addition, there should be a far greater emphasis on the confessions, creeds, and catechisms of the Christian faith in all of those situations.

No, the confessions, creeds, and catechisms are not infallible. Infallibility and inerrancy are reserved only for Scripture. Nevertheless, I contend that the historic confessions, creeds, and catechisms are far superior to anything you and I could cobble together. How can the modern Church, then, at least take some serious steps at what I am describing?

The Way Back

There are many roads that lead us back in the right direction. Allow me to outline just a few. First, we must conclude that bigger isn’t always better. That is, a mega-church with many varied “programs” is not always the best church for modern Christians. In fact, it can be argued that a smaller, more family-oriented congregation could surpass our needs and expectations. A faithful pastor, who week-in and week-out enters the pulpit and unashamedly, boldly, yet simply and understandably, proclaims God’s truth from the scriptures is to be preferred.

Second, you might want to find a congregation that takes Sunday School seriously. One ethicist suggested that Sunday School ought to be similar to military boot camp. Of course, it might not be a drawing card to tell everyone that your Sunday School is like boot camp, but the idea is appealing for a number of reasons. For those of us who have experienced boot camp, we know that it was there that we received the fundamentals of what would keep us alive on the battlefield—we did not receive everything mind you, but certainly the basics that would serve us well and help us survive. Moreover, after boot camp there was a period called A.I.T. or Advanced Individual Training where we were the recipients of training that would refine the basics that we learned in boot camp. For the children, their parents ought to be looking for a congregation that teaches the youth from one of the Church’s catechisms. From my tradition, I am thinking of the Westminster Shorter Catechism and the Heidelberg Catechism. Both are excellent.

Third, and this follows closely on the two previous points, you should be looking for a congregation that through the preaching, teaching, fellowship, and prayers, aims at your spiritual development. What I am describing I usually call a congregation that acts and lives like a “covenant family.” What is that? Generally, it is a body of believers who genuinely love and care for one another. They mourn with those who mourn and rejoice with those who rejoice. They enjoy being around one another and if there is a physical need in the congregation they pitch in to help with meals, transportation, or whatever is needed. They eagerly look forward to worship and learning what God would have them do and how he would have them live—albeit imperfectly. They comprehend the simul in Martin Luther’s famous dictum Simul iustis et peccator. Speaking on justification by faith, Luther described the sinner saved by grace as, at one and the same time (simul), justified and a sinner. We have not arrived in our walk of faith, but we are on the journey of the Christian life. God has placed us on the road that will eventually take us “home.” That is where we want to be, but in the meantime, we seek a meaningful and purposeful life here on earth, fearing God and keeping his commandments.

Dr. Ron Gleason
Bluffton, SC

Bible, Christian Living, worship

The Use of Imprecatory Psalms

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When people try to provide some order in the psalms, one of the strategies they use is to identify different types of psalms, like psalms of praise or lament. When organizing them in this way, one of the categories that presents itself in the psalter is psalms of imprecation, or imprecatory psalms. In these psalms the psalmist calls down curses on his enemies. One such example is Psalm 69. The psalm opens with David asking the Lord to save him from the reproach, shame, and dishonor that fill his life. Those kinds of things might be included in a psalm of lament. And yet later David calls down curses on his enemies. He wants them to become entrapped in their own poisonous plans (v. 22), have their eyes blinded (v. 23), be overtaken by God’s wrath (v. 24), have their camps become desolate (v. 25), experience punishment without mercy (v. 27), and be blotted out of the book of the living (v. 28). Or perhaps more notoriously, Psalm 137:9 exclaims praise for those who destroy Edom: “Blessed shall he be who takes your little ones and dashes them against the rock!” These are difficult words to process for New Testament believers and sometimes cause Christians to wonder about the place of imprecation for New Testament believers.

The Tension with Imprecatory Psalms

That struggle is not without warrant since the tone of the New Testaments seems so different. Romans 12:19 says, “Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, ‘Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.’” Or Jesus says in Matthew 5:43-44: “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I say to you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.”  Further, there are calls to feed your enemy when he is hungry and give him water when he is thirsty (Rom. 12:20). Further Scriptures implies that God is providing for the daily needs of your enemy (Matt. 5:45). Those apparent discrepancies lead some to conclude that Jesus and Paul are at odds with the imprecatory psalms, or even with calls of cursing of God’s enemies generally speaking.

However, to put Jesus and the psalms at odds with each other is without warrant. First, there are also calls of cursing in the New Testament. Clearly the imprecatory psalms are a fairly small category of psalms. Less than 10% of the psalms contain even an imprecatory section. In other words, it is not the main theme of the Old Testament. By way of comparison, a quick glance at the New Testament shows there are also imprecations in the writings of the apostles. For example, in Galatians 1:8 Paul calls curses down on those who would pervert the gospel, when he says, “But even if we or an angel from heaven should preach to you a gospel contrary to the one we preached to you, let him be accursed.” Or in 1 Corinthians 16:22 Paul calls curses down on those who have no love for the Lord when he says, “If anyone has no love for the Lord, let him be accursed. Our Lord come!” Additional examples are found in Galatians 5:12, 2 Timothy 4:14, and Revelation 6:10. It is a mistake to think calling down curses on God’s enemies is something that is uniquely Old Testament, and that the New Testament is filled with patience, grace, and turning the other cheek. The validity of biblical imprecation has to be understood by considering the themes of judgment and mercy together. Depending on how someone is wired they tend to dismiss one or the other, but that cannot be done from a biblical perspective.

Someone with a propensity toward justice tends to minimize statements on God’s mercy and the patience the believer is to exercise in the face of the cruelty of enemies. Someone with a propensity toward mercy will likely begin with a negative view of biblical imprecations. But in understanding the imprecations, justice and mercy must exist together without contradiction. Both exist in Scripture. They simply must be applied properly.

The justice of God, which is expressed in its final form as the ultimate curse of an eternity in hell, will certainly be applied to His enemies. However, today’s enemy may be tomorrow’s friend and vice-versa. Paul begins as a  persecutor of the church, but ends an apostle. Judas Iscariot begins in Jesus’ inner circle of disciples, but becomes a betrayer of the Lord. If the church had called on Paul to be cursed while he was a persecutor, it would have been asking God to curse His apostle. And if the church had asked for Judas to be eternally blessed, they would have been asking for that blessing for the “son of destruction” (John 17:12).

Clearly, there is a use for imprecation for saints of any age, but the application of when it should be used requires discernment. Christians should be able to see that imprecation should not be used by man based on what appears to be so in his limited understanding. Instead, imprecation is applied based on what is finally true, which is only known by the omniscient God. Man’s assessment of a person’s final spiritual condition is always incomplete. Think of the worst person imaginable. Are you sure God will not pardon this guilty sinner by the sacrifice of Christ? Are you certain he will suffer eternally in hell? If not, praying a curse against him as an individual might oppose God’s will. He may be chosen by God to be an object of His mercy.

No child of God will be cursed because Christ has become a curse for him. Likewise, no enemy of God will be blessed because Christ is not his mediator. So when should imprecations be used?

Applications for Imprecatory Psalms & Prayers

The prayers of imprecation are not appropriate for individuals. Christ will certainly conquer all His enemies. However, since man does not know these enemies by name, imprecations should not be offered against an individual. It is right to pray that God would thwart a specific person’s actions, or to pray for mercy and a changed heart for those who oppose God’s church in the present. It is good to pray that God would work all his will in each person’s life, either unto salvation or condemnation. But we must be very careful not to pray a curse on a specific individual.

Prayers of imprecations are appropriate when aimed at the Devil, his demons, the wicked, the enemies of the Lord.  Whoever God’s enemies are, Christians can be certain they will be defeated. Christ conquers, defeats, and judges his foes. Therefore, it is right to pray a curse on God’s enemies. That kind of prayer is simply to agree with God. The Bible states clearly that the devil and the other fallen angels are God’s enemies, and without hope of change. The wicked will be judged. The enemies of the Lord will be defeated. The Christian can pray strongly against these categories, even if, for the most part, the names of individuals are not known. God will curse and judge all His enemies as a group, and He knows perfectly well who they are individually. Therefore the Christian can leave the question of who God’s enemies are to His perfect, omniscient mind. However, since there are enemies of the Lord, curses call be called down on them without indicting any single individuals.

Agreeing with God’s Word

The curses of the Lord are real. For those outside of Christ, their eyes will be darkened with death one day. Then the indignation of God will be poured out on them, and his burning anger will overtake them. Their legacy will be nothing. There will only be the desolation and emptiness of the haunting echoes of hell. Punishment will be added to punishment for them with no hope of acquittal. They will be blotted out from the book of the living, never to be enrolled among the righteous. That is not simple an attempt to frighten. That is the words of the Bible.

The curses of the Bible allow the Christian to agree with God. It allows them to say, in agreement with the message of Scripture, that salvation is found in no other place but the person and work of Christ. There is not any other name under heaven by which men can be saved. And those who are not saved are cursed. That is God’s plan, and it is good. And those who pray and sing imprecations in that general sense are praying for and singing of things agreeable to the will of God.

Pastor Geoff Gleason
Cliffwood Presbyterian Church

10 Commandments, Christian Living, church, Man, Parenting, sabbath

Practical Helps for Honoring the Lord’s Day in Family

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We live in a time when the idea of Sabbath rest is almost entirely disregarded. That is certainly true “out there” in the big bad world. Shopping malls, restaurants, and sporting venues have some of their busiest days on the day that should be reserved for the Lord. At this point, the very notion of commerce ceasing for one day of the week is completely foreign. But it will be of the great benefit of the church to stand against this cultural trend and reclaim this great blessing instituted by God.

From creation, the Lord of glory has set apart one day in seven that His creatures might rejoice worship. I have written in other places about the biblical establishment of the Lord’s Day. This article aims at something different: to encourage and help those Christians who are seeking to honor the Lord and His Day.

North American society no longer provides any aids to this end, which is a fairly recent change in the overall scope of history. I spent twenty-four years of my life living in Canada (1985-2009). In my experience it is, in many ways, a more secular and progressive nation than the United States. But I remember driving by the shopping malls when my family moved there in 1985. The parking lots were empty and the stores were closed on Sunday. Social pressure was exerted on businesses in the form of fines to give one day of rest. The desire to worship the Lord on this one day was long gone, but there was still societal support for those who desired to rest and enjoy God’s blessing. That societal protection is now long gone, both in Canada and the United States. It has been replaced with stores who will not hire people who do not have availability on Sunday, all major sports holding their major championship matches on the Lord’s Day, and a general sense of befuddlement as to why anyone would want to forfeit time for recreation and business for something as quaint as going to church.

Even in churches there is even less and less support for preserving the Lord’s Day. This article is aimed at those within the Church who desire to arrest this slide, beginning in their own homes. The first aim is to outline what must be avoided, and the second is to give ideas for what can be done to promote a joyful Lord’s Day celebration in the church for the good of God’s people.

Things to Be Avoided

The basic call of the Sabbath is to set aside person secular employment and free others for their labor (Exodus 20:8-11). There is an additional expectation that the Sabbath be kept with a spirit of delight in the Lord (Isaiah 58:13-14). But there are certain things that should be avoided because they “grease the wheels” for the temptation to forsake the Lord’s Day.

Making Keeping the Lord’s Day Optional

Habits are often associated with a cold, disinterested hypocrisy. However, the consistency that comes with a habit is really just the internal structure that allows people to pursue the things that are important to them. An example from every day life is weight loss. How many diets provide promises of transformation change only to fail because the habits of the dieter have not been changed? Too many “cheat days” undermine any kind of meaningful progress, or when goals have been achieved the draw of unhealthy foods erase what has been gained. To be at a healthy weight remains the goal, but the inconsistencies make it difficult to achieve it in any meaningful way. So it is with the Lord’s Day.

One of the central distinguishing marks of the Lord’s Day is the call to gather with other Christians in worship. Lack of consistency often undermines that central tenet. A particular circumstance convinces the Christian that just this once it is good to work, stay home from church, or in some other way ignore the fourth commandment. Perhaps there is a pressing deadline or a promising new client who needs something done right away. Perhaps family has come into town for a weekend visit. There are many reasons that can be given for a spiritual “cheat day.” And yet to indulge them is to cut our own feet out from under us. There are works of necessity and mercy that can and should be performed on the Lord’s Day. However, most excuses do not rise to that level. And by making the Lord’s Day optional by neglecting worship for one excuse is to make it easier for excuses to multiply.

Speaking Ill of the Lord’s Day

In families, speech plays an important part in how family members view this day. The way a father speaks about Sunday will shape the way his children think of it. If he complains about the things he does not get to do because of the Lord’s Day, children will be predisposed to think of the Sabbath as an obstruction rather than a blessing. It is right instead to speak of the Lord’s Day as time given to pursue what is out of reach on the other six days due to other responsibilities. It is a day of works of piety where the soul is built up and prepared for what is demanded of the Christian from Monday to Saturday.

If there are complaints of the heart, do nto give them voice. Ask that God would change you so you would delight in the Lord’s Day. Bring your heart in submission to the command of Scripture that you might rejoice in the blessings of worship, physical rest, and heavenly anticipation. Your words will follow suit.

Making the Lord’s Day a Drudgery

The activities of the Lord’s Day should match the words used to describe it. It can be repeated a thousand times that the Lord’s Day is a blessing, but if experience doesn’t match those words those statements will be rejected as false. Do not give occasion for the devil to whisper to your family that the Lord’s Day is not a blessing, but a bore. That is not the same thing as saying that the whims of the human heart must be satisfied for the sake of a positive outlook on the Sabbath. It is saying that for the Christian the Sabbath is to be a delight, and that should be matched in the joyful activities of this day. Rather than a day focused on prohibitions, it should be a day where there are special joys. Do not make it hard for young ones to see that this day is wonderful.

Things to Be Done

There are plenty of other cautions over what not to do, however there should also be consideration of positive activities that can protect this day and the blessing it brings.

Live for the Lord the other Six Days

Hypocrisy is the great turn-off for those who have to live under it. Parental influence regarding the Lord’s Day can be obliterated by hypocrisy. The question answered by a person’s conduct is this: does he really mean it. When it comes to children, words are necessary, but easily undermined. Claims about biblical holiness are denied in deed. Parental example given the other six days of the week will either affirm or deny instruction given about the Lord’s Day. Christianity is not a one-day-per-week proposition and that must be modelled. Christianity is the life of the born-again believer who knows the extent and cost of Christ’s work of salvation for him. It is the life of a thankful, rescued soul. And that kind of life cannot be faked.

Making the Day Special

The Sabbath is the most special of all days because it uniquely permits man to do the things he will do in heaven. Worship is to be the delight of this day, but there are other ways to cultivate a joyful attitude toward the Lord’s Day. If it is the most special day of the week, there are additional ways of marking it as such.

    • Busy parents can give their undivided attention to family. Special family memories can be built through family walks, playing games, and other good things. It does not take away from the Lord’s Day to build Christian fellowship within the family.
    • Hospitality encourages the communion of the saints. In heaven worship is a corporate event, not a private one. The saints are to be the delight of the Christian, and that is fostered through hospitality. It allows children to build relationships with others that makes them delight in the going to the church. They are meeting their friends there.
    • Children are stimulated by discussions about the big questions of life. Especially as children get older, they are interested in the thorny ethical problems, theological controversies, or issues where the world and the Christian are at odds.
    • Songs should be sung in the home that prepare the family for participation in worship. For little ones, memorized songs are one of the few ways they can actively participate in worship. It is good to provide them with those opportunities to break up an otherwise long service.
Praising the Lord for His Day

Verbalizing the privilege of the Lord’s Day is good for the soul. To delight in the Lord is to delight in His worship. There is one day in seven that reminds the Christian of that central delight. Contentment is expressed by praise to the Lord for the gift of rest. Words of praise could be spoken dishonestly which is obviously wrong. But words of praise spoken truthfully are a great help to remembering that the Lord’s Day is not to be cast aside.

The Lord’s Day is to be a delight. A day set apart to remind the Christian that God exists and that He is to be worshiped. However much the world may desire to eliminate that memorial day, the Christian must fight to maintain it. It is a safeguard for him against the movements away from religion and personal holiness.

Pastor Geoff Gleason
Cliffwood Presbyterian Church

 

Belief about God, Christian Living, Gospel, Sanctification

The Christian and Spiritual Exhaustion

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“What is man’s chief end? Man’s chief end is to glorify God and enjoy Him forever.”

So starts the Westminster Shorter Catechism. Christians who are part of a theologically reformed church, have probably heard that opening question and answer many times. They may have even memorized it. But it is not uncommon that these same people fail to abide by it, even if it is just for a short season. To know what should be does not necessarily translate to what is. There are several things that can hinder the transition from knowing we should enjoy the Lord to the practice of glorifying Him. One of those things is spiritual exhaustion.

When exhaustion takes over, it can be easy for the Christian life to be seen as a chore. Even the things God has given for the building up of His children can be treated as lifeless: reading Scripture, prayer, the worship of the saints. Man is but dust, and so it is not surprising that he experiences spiritual fatigue. However, explaining how a man might end up there is not the same as affirming that they should remain that way. Before change can set in, there must first be an honest assessment of how the exhaustion set in. Only then will there be a clear understanding of what God has given. When His grace is clearly seen, there a humility that forms the foundation of change grows and restores the belief that God’s glory is man’s most intense delight.

The Path to Spiritual Fatigue

First, then, there must be some self-examination about how this spiritual exhaustion came about. That process is complicated, because there are many ways to become spiritually exhausted.

One path is to replace love for God in Christ with spiritual activity. The ideal biblical picture of a healthy Christian walk is described in 1 John 5:3: “For this is the love of God, that we keep his commandments. And his commandments are not burdensome.” There are three points of emphasis that can be drawn out from this verse. First, the heart behind all piety is love of God. Second, the way of holiness is keeping of God’s commandments. Third, the delight of obedience that flows from love keeps it from being burdensome. To avoid spiritual exhaustion all three principles must be lived out. If love for God is missing, the externals of the Christian life becomes a burden and causes the Christian to become exhausted.

A quick caution is in order. The fatigue that robs us of our spiritual joy should not be attributed to the tools God gives the Christian, but rather to man’s pursuit of that tool as his goal. There is a vast difference between reading the Bible so you can hear the voice of the Lord versus getting through your reading list for the day as a chore. Externally, the activity is the same: a Christian reading the Bible. But reading to hear God’s voice for faith and practice results in delight, while reading to finish a list will result in pressure. So when exhaustion arrives it is prudent and wise to examine motivations that sit underneath external Christian obedience. A Christless “Christian” will be a joyless one.

There is another, more passive path that hinders joy in the Lord. A person may loose his way in holiness because he becomes overwhelmed with life. His sight of God has become obstructed. Like a child who looses sight of his parents in a crowd, Christians who loose sight of God become exhausted and fearful because of their weakness. Peter exercised great faith in getting out of the boat and walking on the water to Jesus. And he did not sink because he intentionally left behind the things of the Lord. But he lost sight of Jesus, looked at his circumstances and became fearful. “But when he saw the wind, he was afraid, and beginning to sink he cried out, ‘Lord, save me.’” (Matt. 14:30). When Peter’s circumstances obstruct his view of Christ, he is overwhelmed and begins to sink. So it is with a Christian who looses sight of God because of the business of life.

Finally, a Christian may also be robbed of his spiritual joy because he is compromised by sin. That person is living in hypocrisy, professing faith on the one hand, but denying that profession on the other. That is not to say that Christians will not sin. But the very fact that they are living inconsistently will be a cause for sorrow. Surely there are other causes. I recommend Martyn Lloyd-Jones, Spiritual Depression: its causes and curesas a tremendous resource to take a deeper dive into the causes of spiritual discouragement. But these three will serve the foundation for the thoughts presented in this article. The good news is that no cause of spiritual discouragement needs to be permanent. There is a remedy which can be applied to them all.

Theological Refreshment

To combat the wanderings of his heart, the Christian must first be refreshed in his joy in the gospel. It is through being refreshed in the great doctrines of the Bible that the Christian is reminded that God alone is the legitimate center of man’s affections. Consider the following components of the gospel.

First, know the unworthiness of the sinner. Before the greatness of God’s gift is understood, man must know the seriousness of his condition. The prodigal son did not realize the privilege of life in his father’s family until he was removed from his fathers house and saw the difference between himself and his father’s servants (Luke 15:11-32). A true sense of God’s generosity is obscured if the Christian does not see the depth of his fall. If suffering from spiritual exhaustion, the Christian should ask himself whether he has understood who he is. Growth in grace can be misunderstood as being the result of human activity. Constant comparison with the sins of others promotes a position of pride. Yet, Christian joy begins by knowing personal culpability before the Lord.

Once personal guilt is remembered, the Christian can move to the second truth, namely the greatness of the gift of eternal life. People can obscure the greatness of God’s gift by not looking at their own sin, but a failure to remember the character of the gift itself can do the same. A young child may receive a great present but think that the box is the gift. However, if he would open the box he would see how much greater the actual gift is. The Christian deserves death but is given life. His sin brings destruction and grief, but joy comes to him in the morning. The depth of sin and the despair it brings elevates the joy salvation delivers.

The third gospel reality that undergirds recovery from spiritual exhaustion is his future inheritance. The biblical picture of the Christian’s inheritance is the New Jerusalem (Revelation 21). The splendor of that place is such that the most precious jewels and metals known to man are basic construction materials: pavements, gates, etc. However at times discouragement occupies a more prominent place because of a failure to look past daily difficulties. Yet God’s promised future inheritance is far greater than an easy life today. His gift extends beyond relief from inconvenience and trouble today. There is a qualitative change between even the greatest pleasures of today and the perfect heavenly delights. Today’s comfort is temporary, but in heaven it will be eternal. Today’s best life are affected by sin, but life in heaven has none. Today’s relief is temporary, but in heaven there is no return to oppression and sorrow ever. The future promised gift is far greater than man’s imaginations for today.

These gospel truths form a solid foundation to recover from spiritual exhaustion. God is good, and has promised something far greater than today’s difficult experiences. The Christian can endurance and even be joyful in these hardships because God’s promises work tremendous delight. But there are also some practical things that can be done.

Practical Solutions

Remember Christ and His Sacrifice on the Cross

The theological foundation for joy laid out above must be transferred from the head to the heart. Meditation can be a great aid for such a move. Christian meditation is neither flaky nor mystical. It considers biblical definitions in the mind and convinces the heart of their value. Through prayer and considering the promises and arguments of Scripture, the Christian must embrace that his aim is not to have an easy life today. Rather it is the account of reconciliation. The hope of God’s people is not to follow the sinful desires of the flesh, but to pursue holiness. Satisfaction is ultimately not found in the few days given on this earth. Rather looking ahead to heaven, and resting on God’s eternal blessing and grace reminds the Christian of affection for God as the first delight and highest highest value.

Assess priorities and set aside things that hinder them

There is also a need to move from simply thinking correctly to taking some measures to adjust unhelpful choices. There are times to consider whether current time commitments are obstructing Christian joy. There are many good things that could be done, but not all of them should be done by one person. If business is causing enjoyment of the Lord to suffer something has to change. It may be helpful to make a list of what could be done and organize it according to priority. Make sure this list is realistic. For example, young moms should not schedule a prolonged time of personal study at 9am when children are waking up and need her care. A husband should not plan his work-out during the time when the kids need to be put to bed because his family needs him to be present. Starting from the bottom things should be eliminated to create the space and time so joy in the Lord is protected.

Order your day so exhaustion does not come

At times people invite exhaustion by failing to taking advantage of a very useful tool: structure. Certainly, there is variety in tolerance for spontaneity, but structure sets limits on the emotional energy to be spent. In families, structuring a child’s time is freeing for parents. There is a marked start and finish for the activity, which removes uncertainty. In individuals, structure restrains the impulse to do only what is preferred and directs a proportionate time to what is needed. Chaos breeds exhaustion, and structure helps contain the chaos. A little bit of planning and structure goes a long way.

Think of how temporary earthly goals are

Connected to setting priorities, people expend a tremendous amount of emotional energy in the pursuit of things that will not last. That does not mean that anything that is not directly “spiritual” is not worth pursuing. However, the things of this world can get in the way of the pursuit of a healthy devotional life. It is a matter of first loves, at times. Recreational activities can replace worship. Earthly riches replace heavenly treasure. If a person spends all his time in the pursuit of earthly things, the curtain is pulled back on what he values most.

Joy is a fruit of the Holy Spirit. And when it is missing in the Christian, something has gone wrong. To address the issue there must first be an understanding of where he has become derailed. Second, he must be refreshed and filled up with the joy that comes from knowing God’s promises are applied to him. And then steps must be taken to address places where he is not helping himself. All of this is done for the glory of God, by the power of God that is at work in the believer. And as the Christian rests in the true light of the gospel, refreshment will come.

“Even youths shall faint and be weary, and young men shall fall exhausted; but they who wait for the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.” Isaiah 40:30-31

Belief about God, Children, Christian Living, church

Death and Dying – Part 2

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Last installment looked at death in light of the things that could be learned from it. There we saw that not all experience in dealing with death is negative. The positive working of the Lord can be easily observed, if we watch and wait. For example, awareness of man’s need for God is often deepened in our trials. The sufferer is blessed as the Church cares for its members, often in ways that are deeply meaningful to those affected. The need for a future hope is impressed on those saying good-bye to a loved one. And yet we also remembered that experiencing the death of a loved-one certainly also has its grief and pain.

The trial of death in the family carries with it a finality and shock for which I was not prepared. The death of a loved-one is a uniquely difficult moment. It is easy to question whether enough was done for the one who is now passed. The familiar places the deceased loved-one used to enjoy remain painfully empty. However, by God’s grace and looking toward His promises, these difficult experiences can also be integrated and made beneficial in the process of adjusting to life without that loved-one present. However, in this article, I want to warn Christians against some pitfalls to be avoided in their sorrows and grief.

Pitfalls to Be Avoided

Amidst the positive and negative lessons, especially in the case of death, there can be many causes for stumbling. Emotions can cloud the mind and overwhelm the mourner to the point of obscuring God’s promises. Below are some examples of things Christians must work hard to avoid. It may perhaps even be necessary to pray that God would deliver you from such things if they have already taken hold of your heart.

Being Overwhelmed by Grief.

First, when grief paralyzes a person it is a sign that they have lost sight of hope. That is not to say such an experience is not understandable. Elijah was overwhelmed to the point of wanting to die (1 Kings 19:4). However, simply because we can be sympathetic to something that happens, does not mean we should be content to remain in such a condition. There is nothing the devil likes better than for God’s people to be blinded by grief. The weight of grief can be combatted by constant reminders of God’s promise that those who are in Christ the Son are united to God the Father in life and death. Certainly, Paul could have become blinded to the Lord because of the extent of his tribulations. His ministry included imprisonment, beatings, and near-death experiences (2 Corinthians 11:23-27). And yet he can write of the Christian:

“We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed; always carrying in the body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be manifested in our bodies. For we who live are always being given over to death for Jesus’ sake, so that the life of Jesus also may be manifested in our mortal flesh.” (2 Corinthians 4:8-11)

To avoid being overcome by grief requires preparation. Christians must study and know the ways of the Lord, have a firm understanding of His promises, and lay an expectation of hope to avoid being overwhelmed in the moment.

Reproaches against the Lord

Second, we may react to our circumstances by blaming God. The grief caused by death is intense, and it is understandable for a person to feel weighed down and discouraged under its weight. However, to charge God with wrong-doing is a sinful and unhealthy response to pain and grief. It is an error to lay blame at God’s feet. The Christian’s response cannot continue in this way.

Christian, I would urge you to remind yourself that God is good. Consider the following:

    • Remind yourself that He knows all things, also today’s circumstances. He created the heavens and the earth and governs them today. Certainly He is better able to discern all that is taking place in your trial, and all the good things that He will work in you through it.
    • Think about all the good things He has given in this life.
    • Remember the many joyful days He did give with your loved one.
    • If you are struggling with contentment before the Lord, lay down your pride. You do not know better than the Lord. The sliver of time that you can observe and interpreted with limited knowledge cannot always fathom what the Lord is doing in any particular moment.

Taking Job as an example, after he lost all 10 of his children he was able to say, “Naked I came from my mother’s womb, and naked shall I return. The LORD gave, and the LORD has taken away; blessed be the name of the LORD” (Job 1:21). We must train our hearts and affections by a diligent study of the ways God demonstrates His goodness in His word so that we can say the same as our brother Job.

Withdrawal and Isolation

The last pitfall to be avoided is the desire to remove yourself from contact with the saints. Perhaps you are afraid to answer the questions. Perhaps you just simply want to be by yourself to process through your thoughts. And yet, the body of Christ is there specifically so that we do not deal with these things alone. We need more comfort than we are willing to admit. The people who ask questions about your well-being, even if someone else has asked you the same thing five minutes ago, is loving you well. Answering these questions, even repeatedly, actually helped me tremendously to move past the intensity of the grief. Even if it is hard, do not forsake gathering together with the Church. They will help carry you through.

These last two articles are not meant to be a definitive or exhaustive treatment of the subject of death and dying. Much more could be said. Instead it is an attempt to briefly summarize lessons I’ve learned in my own recent experience. May the Lord bless His people as they seek to deal well with an enemy who, though defeated, yet causes much sorrow of soul in the Christian.

Children, Christian Living, Love for God

Death and Dying – Part 1

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When death casts its shadow over the brightness of life, it can shake you to the very foundations of your being. December 24, 2024 that shadow was cast over our home. After 26 years of life, our daughter Naya drew her last breath. Hers had been a difficult life. Only three days before she was placed on hospice care, genetic testing revealed she had a condition called Sanfilippo Syndrome. Her whole life she bore witness to the effects of sin through the deterioration of her body and mind. Physiologically she could not break down certain sugar molecules, which in turn accumulated in her body and gradually destroyed her central nervous system and brain function.

On July 2, 1998 my wife and I welcomed a precious daughter who became a vibrant, happy, and good-natured toddler who talked, laughed, joked, ran, played piano (a little), and wrote her name. By the time she turned four, though not knowing the name of her condition, we realized something was not right. By age 11 she began to have massive seizures. By age 14 her loss of skills was noticeable. By the time we laid her to rest she had long-since ceased to walk, talk, smile, feed herself, or interact with us in any noticeable way. In some sense, we said good-bye to Naya a little bit at a time. And yet at her death we realized just how unprepared we were for what was to come.

There was no doubt in our minds about God’s sovereign right to deal with us and our daughter according to His will and His ultimate goodness in all that He ordains. Because of our dependence on the truth of the gospel, there was no lack of hope. 1 Thessalonians 4:14 assured us with these words: “For since we believe that Jesus died and rose again, even so, through Jesus, God will bring with him those who have fallen asleep.” We were realistic about what the future held for Naya. She had suffered so much pain in the months before her passing and we were aware how death would free her from that hardship. We knew that for Naya to live is Christ and to die is gain (Philippians 1:21). As a pastor I have encouraged people to grieve as those who have hope (1 Thessalonians 4:13). And yet there was a definite weight and heaviness to the grief and it crashed over us with all the power of a tsunami wave.

I can testify to the saying that God refines us in the crucible of suffering. Not any one person could describe all the different forms that suffering may take, neither is that my intention here. However, I hope to give some of the lessons, which are still very fresh, that I have learned by facing death for the sake of comforting or preparing others who will certainly face the same trial.

Positive Lessons Learned

Not all the lessons learned through grief are corrective. God in His grace gave many instances where we were able to see, even in the moment, the good that He was doing through this painful circumstance. In Naya’s case, there was about a six week span were we slowly began to realize that the end was near for her. And in these six weeks we saw the Lord do wonderful things.

Dependence on God

There is no man who is not dependent on God for his life and breath. But suffering and hardship make that reality more apparent by increasing the awareness of the need of God. This need is often expressed through an increased desire for and practice of personal and family prayer. In our suffering we were more eager to go to Him in prayer in which we were encouraged by a constant awareness of the promises of God. Our powerlessness in the moment made us look to our Heavenly Father for strength and mercy. It is easy to become complacent in prayer, forget God’s promises, think there is always a human solution to any problem, or to divert your trust to doctors and nurses. Yet God alone governs, and the Christian should look to Him. Suffering reminded me of that truth.

Care from His People

God uses His people to care for His suffering children. A healthy Christian will spend more time ministering that receiving ministry. And it can make them slow to receive help. But the body of Christ, both local and extended, cared for us in our season of grief. They did so through expressions of sympathy, kind notes and cards, a mountain of casseroles that even our crew had trouble eating ourselves out of, and by being physically present at the funeral. To receive the ministry of the Lord’s people is a tremendous blessing.

Hope for the Future

People often live as if life will not always conclude with death. However, death is the inevitable consequence of sin. Naya’s short life bore out the fragility of what 2 Corinthians 5:1 calls “the tent that is our earthly home.” Modern medicine has made it possible to prolong life, and that can be a tremendous blessing. But there will be a moment when we all say good-bye to our earthly tent. It is impossible to hold on to this life forever. All must face the reality of the life to come. And the promises of the Bible remind the Christian that instead of agony over the end of life, there should be a hopeful expectation of eternal life for those who belong to Christ. The anticipation of that hope makes enduring death different for the Christian.

Painful Experiences Lived

And for all the wonderful lessons Christians learn through grief and pain, they are still…grief and pain. The Bible does not minimize sorrow in the face of death. Jesus Himself weeps at Lazarus’ tomb (John 11:35). Christians are exhorted not to “grieve as others do who have no hope” (1 Thessalonians 4:13), but that does not mean we are to deny grief and the pain of death altogether. Below are some of the more painful parts of death and dying.

The Shock of Death

However much end-of-life issues are discussed, I do not think anyone is actually prepared for the finality of it. My wife and I knew we would likely be the ones to release Naya into the Lord’s hands. And yet once the decision to put her on hospice care was made the finality of the decision pressed in on us. It set in motion a process where we were hurtling toward an inevitable conclusion. And even as you wait for death to come, nothing prepares you for that moment your loved ones takes that last breath. There is an agony that washes over you. It is a front-row seat into the awfulness of death. That pain and sorrow is incomparable to any other loss in this life.

Failures of the Past

Facing and experiencing the death of a loved-one also brings to mind failures in how you loved them. Moments of impatience otherwise long buried are resurrected in the mind with a vividness that makes it seem they were committed yesterday. Past failures to love as Christ loves His people become abundantly clear. And at times these remembrances can send shivers up your spine. All the excuses which might otherwise satisfy become obviously inadequate.

Sorrow over a Missing Companion

Death robs the living of the presence of those who have “fallen asleep.” This reality sinks in the days immediately following death as family routines are forever changed. In our case, the first mornings after Naya’s death we woke up prepared to bathe, feed, and care for her as we had for years before. And just as soon as the thought entered our minds we immediately were faced with the fact that we did not have that responsibility for her anymore. Places like empty bedrooms or favorite chairs can become monuments to a new and permanent absence.

These painful experiences, however sharp, are also used by the Lord to direct man to Himself. Though the Christian may feel great weakness in the moment, he should be comforted by the resurrection of Christ.

“‘Death is swallowed up in victory.’
‘O death, where is your victory?
O death, where is your sting?’”
(1 Corinthians 15:54b-55)

Comfort and tears can live side-by-side. The tears do not indicate a lack of trust in the Lord, but show a proper agony over the effects of sin and provide a proper framework for longing for heaven.

Next installment will look at how the intensity of grief over death can tempt us to stumble in certain ways.

Children, Christian Living, Love for God, Sanctification, Sin

The Christian and Conflict in the Extended Family – Part 2

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Last installment outlined the obligations of the Christian in his extended family. These are unique among all relationships a Christian may have in the world in that they are joined with the biblical directives to honor and provide for family. The complicating factor, as it is being considered, is that family, especially those who are not in Christ, can create significant disruptions in Christian homes. This second installment is looking beyond the biblical obligations and seeking to apply these things in the areas where it seems difficult.

Responding to Sin

It is possible to have many concerns about unbelieving family members, especially if relational tensions currently running high. The reality of a fallen world means that there are cautions that should be considered, even in light of the obligations to honor and provide as outlined in part 1. There are family members that are destructive and heinous sins that cannot be overlooked. These may rightly create the need for physical and/or emotional distance between family members.

Though not all complications that arise in families are of the same caliber; and though the principles of honor and provision always apply in some form, the fifth commandment is not to obeyed as an absolute command that can never considered with reference to  a particular circumstance. The Bible does not require the Christian to submit himself to public ridicule or physical danger caused by the unrepentant and repeated sin of an extended family member. It does not require parents to put their children in situations where they may be emotionally or physically hurt. In those instances the command to honor and provide is considered in tandem with the additional obligation to nurture and care for children. In those cases the biblical call to honor, love, act faithfully, submit, and be patient are still the default though the practice of these things may look different than in instances where the sin is not present.

Take, for example, a situation where a family member belittles others for their faith in Christ, constantly blasphemes the name of the Lord or whose temper is out of control, where physical or sexual abuse is a real danger. In these instances, it is right to obey the fifth commandment from afar. The sinful behavior of family members may require the Christian to remove themselves from their company (for a time, or maybe even permanently). In these few cases, the danger and damage of sin necessitates the removal, not some private desire for vengeance or getting even.

Responding to Annoyance

For most Christians, the answer to how to behave among unbelieving extended family members will not be found by considering the extraordinary circumstances described above. Again, these cases will be rare. The difficulty most Christians will have with extended family members is dealing with the minor hurts and annoyances that come with being a Christian among unbelievers. There may be a feeling of aloneness because no one in the family values the things important to the Christian. There may be exclusion from certain family events which are scheduled on the Lord’s Day and other things like these. How does the Christian navigate these annoying parts of life with unbelieving family members? Below are a few practical considerations.

Do not respond in like manner. People say hurtful things. Part of honoring unbelieving parents and family members in general is not to respond in like manner when they make small belittling comments. That does not mean the Christian could not respond in some way. More on that below. However, Christians are to bear with their enemies (Matthew 5:44). And if that is so for enemies, how much more for irritating family members.

When the Christian experiences minor hurt because of insensitivity or a sense of disapproval or disrespect, though there may be a natural distances that develops in those relationships, the Bible still calls the Christian to honor and provide. How can that be done?

  • By insisting that their children address unbelieving grand-parents, uncles and aunts with a proper respectful title.
  • By refraining from criticizing these extended family members in front of their children.
  • By making a point of sincerely thanking the unbelieving and difficult parent for the blessings they have bestowed on their family.

Other such verbal acknowledgements of respect or restraints of criticism are appropriate, even when there have been some minor emotional hurts that have been received.

Providing financially for family. Faithfulness is a fruit of the Holy Spirit and can be seen in how the Christian member responds when unbelieving family members are in need. The Bible views financial assistance to family as an essential trait of Christian charity: “But if anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for members of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.”[i] It is not right to expect others, who are not related, to provide for parents, children, and siblings who are in need no matter how they have hurt or annoyed. Where help is needed, the Christian should be prepared to provide it, even if relationships are strained. That does not mean sharing a home, or even frequent visits. However, material care can and should be offered.

Providing clarity in the case of offenses. It can be difficult to speak or hurt and sin with those who hold a different understanding of how the world works. The risk of misunderstanding is great. But if an offense cannot be overlooked, Christians should communicate clearly the reasons and nature of the received offense also to unbelievers. That should be done with charity, not assuming guilt, seeking explanation, and with a desire to reconcile. Remember, “love covers a multitude of sins”[ii] and the Christian’s first impulse should be to cover in love. However, if covering is not possible, a honest, compassionate, but yet a direct explanation of the problem should be pursued. The outcome of this conversation may be distance in the relationship, either because the offender would not listen, or because the offender becomes angry because of the confrontation, no matter how gently it was done.

Be quick to forgive. The greatness of the forgiveness of the Lord for His people through Christ Jesus should make them the most eager to forgive others. “Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.”[iii] It is easy to hold on to offenses. But because God does not hold on to the offense of the sins of repentant sinners, so also the Christian should be quick to forgive. That is especially the case with family members. Should they make an apology, the Christian should be quick to accept it, even if it is not framed in biblical terminology.

There is much more that could be said, but the summary of the fifth commandment by the Heidelberg Catechism gives a good starting point.

Q. What does God require in the fifth commandment?

A. That I show all honor, love, and faithfulness to my father and mother and to all those in authority over me, submit myself with due obedience to their good instruction and discipline, and also have patience with their weaknesses and shortcomings, since it is God’s will to govern us by their hand.[iv]

God is the One who establishes families, and also in His providence the specific members of families. They are not all easy to get along with, especially when they do not share a common faith. But in all instances, God is to be worshiped. And so the Christian should live among unbelieving family members with a desire to honor and love them, to help their family unit as needed, to show deference where possible, and to patiently bear with their weaknesses. It is not always an easy ministry, but it is a ministry that when done in obedience to the Lord gives Him great glory.

[i] 1 Timothy 5:8.

[ii] 1 Peter 4:8.

[iii] Ephesians 4:32.

[iv] Heidelberg Catechism #39, https://www.heidelberg-catechism.com/en/lords-days/39.html

Bible, Children, Christian Living

The Christian and Conflict in the Extended Family – Part I

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“You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden. Nor do people light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a stand, and it gives light to all in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven.” (Matthew 5:14-16)

Parents exert a lot of energy nurturing their children, protecting them from evil, and pointing them to the right way to live. With few notorious exceptions, that all parents share those goals, whether Christian or not. In a nation as large as the United States, it is not surprising when there is tremendous variety in terms of how people think that should be done. When these world-views clash people naturally end up avoiding those who they think exercise poor influence over their children. And in most relationships that is a normal and acceptable response. But what is to be done when the bad influence arises from your own extended family?

Extended family can undermine the hard work Christian parents are doing to train up their children “in the discipline and instruction of the Lord” (Eph. 6:4). But the response to unbelieving extended family is more complicated because the Bible outlines some basic obligations for Christians in their larger families. These obligations are unique to the family relationship. The basic question is, “How does a Christian balance the call to honor parents and provide for them when parents, or perhaps extended family as a whole, do not honor the Lord and exercise a negative influence on your nuclear family unit of husband, wife, and children?” But answering this question is complicated and requires an examination first of the ethical obligation of the fifth commandment and second, of the practical steps that can be taken in this regard.

The Ethical Obligation

When relationships are in family bounds, there are unique obligations. These obligations complicate the decisions that are to be made. People enter almost all relationships voluntarily. Perhaps there is a common stage of life or interest; perhaps work or school brings people together. Whatever the case may be, people willingly enter these relationships and are free to leave them if relational obstacles become too great. However, family relationships have with them an aspect of obligation, at least biblically speaking. There are two broad categories that can be considered.

First, there is the obligation of honor. “Honor your father and your mother.”[i] There does not seem to be a limit attached to that biblical mandate. As part of the Ten Commandments there is an abiding nature for all people everywhere to live in obedience to this law. The question of how that is done may be various, but the biblical expectation is that it should be done.

Second, there is the obligation of provision. “But if anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for members of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.”[ii] To fail to provide materially for family is the expectation of Scripture.

In all but the most exceptional circumstances, some traces of these should be visible in how the extended family is treated. There should be a great hesitancy to cut off even difficult family members because the obligations above are not simply self-help principles, but divine directives. God is the author of families and the obligations attached to those relationships. And though there be variety in all the different relationships within that family, the Christian is to do all he can to live to the glory of God, by ordering his life according to God’s instruction.

In the case of relationships between people, the fifth commandment gives God’s direction. “Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long in the land that the LORD your God is giving you.”[iii] And though father and mother are specifically mentioned, the applications of this commandment extent to all human relationships.

“Q. What is required in the fifth commandment?
A. The fifth commandment requireth the preserving the honor, and performing the duties, belonging to everyone in their several places and relations, as superiors, inferiors, or equals.”[iv]

Whether the members of the extended family in question are parents or siblings there is a biblical obligation to preserve honor and perform duties. The trickier question is to wade through what that may look like in this world of sin and misery. The Heidelberg Catechism summarizes the requirements of the fifth commandment as follows:

Q. What does God require in the fifth commandment?
A. That I show all honor, love, and faithfulness to my father and mother and to all those in authority over me, submit myself with due obedience to their good instruction and discipline, and also have patience with their weaknesses and shortcomings, since it is God’s will to govern us by their hand.[v]

Before getting to the specifics of behavior, notice first that the Christian’s relationship to his parents is based on his relationship to God. Because God has placed these specific parents in their lives, any other behavior expressed in the horizontal way (between people) involves a vertical aspect (between God and man) as well. It is God’s will to have these imperfect families knit together. And with that perspective as a foundation, the Heidelberg Catechism encourages Christians to relate to father and mother with five characteristics. The complications of sin may necessitate different approaches to each, but the Christian should strive to manifest each:

Honor

At a very basic level, Christians should honor their parents. From young children to grown children that obligation is the same. To clarify, to honor is not the same thing as to obey. Obedience is carrying out instructions given by an authority. To honor someone is to give a recognizable expression of respect to those who occupy specific relational places. A cultural example will suffice to demonstrate what that may be.

In the south, many parents teach their children to honor the adults around them by using titles or salutations like “sir” or “ma’am.” They are not expecting their children to obey all the instructions that person gives them, but they are teaching them to show them honor. That call to honor is still present in the relationship of adult children to their parents, even if they be unbelieving.

Love

To love is more than to have a feeling. Love involves feelings, but it is more than simply emotion. To love often also involves exercises the will. The will chooses to look favorably or gently on those who are far from perfect. Loving successfully in the more intimate relationships (marriage, family, close friends) involves making choices that go against the emotion of the moment.

The Bible describes love as follows: “Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth.”[vi] Love is defined in this way not only for those who are easy to be around, or even for those who are believers. Corinthians provides the Christian definition of love as a reflection of how God loves His people first. Love is meant to compensate for the failures that all people will have in relationships and must be exercised toward our families.

Faithfulness

A right understanding of divine providence means recognizing that God can place even difficult or unbelieving people in a Christian’s family. Recognizing the divine will in these things encourages the exercise of faithfulness. Faithfulness is maintaining a commitment to a group or individual. The Lord Jesus is faithful to His people. “If we are faithless, he remains faithful.”[vii] In light of Jesus’ faithfulness in the face of man’s faithlessness, how much more should the Christian be faithful in his family? And in the context of family, to be faithful is to remain unmoved in terms of commitment to the family unity regardless of the behavior of others.

Submission

Adults are not required to submit to their parents as children are. The word the Heidelberg Catechism uses that provides the proper amount of flexibility is “due obedience.” Though grown children do not owe parents obedience as children living in under the parental roof do, there is still a healthy dose of deference that should accompany the adult child’s relationship with the parent.

Patience

1 Corinthians 13:4-6 (quoted above) includes patience as part of love. That inclusion proves the exercise of love requires overcoming feelings. Miriam Webster defines patience as “bearing pains or trials calmly or without complaint.”[viii] Patience by definition involves situations of pain and trial. These are not pleasant circumstances for the person in or under them. But love includes overlooking pain and trial caused by another, or at least bearing with it. Even when family members are hard to love, the Bible calls for patience, whether they be believers or not.

It is easy to judge the faults of parents. They are often magnified in the eyes of their children because they have seen them at their worst. Stress in public verses the home, rightly or wrongly, is handled differently. Words are spoken with greater care when the world is watching. Issues are most often addressed with more charity outside the home. That is not to justify these discrepancies. It is a simple observation of fact.

This first article is meant to deal with the ideal. Especially in family relationships, the Bible gives certain parameters that must be observed as a matter of obligation. The Christian is to honor and provide. These things look acceptable and clear on paper, but trying to live them out is another matter. And so the next installment will look at living with family in a fallen world.

[i] Exodus 20:12.

[ii] 1 Timothy 5:18.

[iii] Exodus 20:12.

[iv] Westminster Shorter Catechism #64.

[v] Heidelberg Catechism #39, https://www.heidelberg-catechism.com/en/lords-days/39.html

[vi] 1 Corinthians 13:4-6.

[vii] 2 Timothy 2:13.

[viii] https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/patient.

Belief about God, Bible, Christian Living, church, Love for God

Responding to Hurricane Helene – Part 2

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Last installment the stage was set for a broader consideration of how the Christian should respond to God’s providence using Job 2:9-10. In the midst of tremendous loss, Job maintains his spiritual integrity, event worshiping God who he saw as taking things away from him. This topic is important especially for those who have just suffered the effects of hurricane Helene. And yet it is applicable to all because we are all subject to God’s providence.

The Providence of God

Westminster Shorter Catechism defines God’s providence in this way: “What are God’s works of providence? God’s works of providence are, his most holy, wise, and powerful preserving and governing all his creatures, and all their actions.”[1] In the book of Job the reader is challenged to understand how God governs His creatures and their actions, and how to properly respond to that reality. Since God governs all His creatures and all their actions, that means good times and disaster come from Him. God does not remove Himself from this world after He makes it as the Deists would teach, but continually governs it. He cares for the creation, superintending all His creatures and all their actions.

What Job teaches the Christian is that he should respond with the same level of contentment in both kinds of circumstances. And that is challenging. In some sense easy times make us complacent and hard times make us grumble, but from Job’s lips the Christian is reminded that we should receive both by remembering that it is God’s providence, His governance of his days that has brought these circumstances into being.

God’s Good Providences

In the book of Job the tension is not that he has received too many blessings from the Lord. It is rather the opposite. Job has experienced a shattering of his life and his tragedy is real. Even for those who have experienced this most recent hurricane, it is still predominantly true that those in the United States can sing with the psalmist: “The lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; indeed, I have a beautiful inheritance.”[2]The vast majority of westerners live under God’s good providences, which are experienced in different ways.

His provision. The Lord provides for His people in a variety of ways. He does so materially by giving food, clothing, housing, and other possessions. He does so emotionally by blessing Christians with friends, family, and most often a spouse with whom to share life. He does so through the technological advancements of our time with vastly improved medical technology, and other inventions that provide ease and comfort in life. There are many others that could be listed here. Most of the time people hardly give these any thought, and even assume that these are their right. And yet because all men participated in the sin of Adam and add to that guilt daily by sinful thoughts, words, and deeds, it is in the provisions that God gives that He demonstrated His kindness.

His protection. In God’s governance of His creation there is security because in it God protects His people. In Job, the only reason the devil has access to him is that God gives him permission. Often in prayer meetings, Christians will pray for a “hedge of protection” around someone. That phrase is derived from the devil’s conversation with God. When the devil responds to God’s praise of Job’s faithfulness he says, “Have you not put a hedge around him and his house and all that he has, on every side?”[3] The Christian lives with the knowledge that nothing happens to him apart from the permission of his loving Heavenly Father.

Most often, the Lord directs these protections through secondary means. Parents are used to protect their children both physically and spiritually. The elders of the church exercise their office for the protection of faith and practice among God’s people. Governing authorities protect their citizens from evil and promote what is good. These institutions do not exist apart from God’s appointment, but are instances of His tremendous kindness in his good providences.

His pardon. The greatest aspect of God’s work of providence is the way He redeems people from the guilt of sin. All people are by nature guilty before God because of their sin. And yet some are declared righteous and pardoned from the guilt of their sin. It is God’s providence that any turn. None would be reconciled to God on their own. The condition of man is dire. He is “dead in sin and trespass”[4] and even Christians are naturally “children of wrath like the rest of mankind.”[5] There is no possible way to escape the significance of this natural condition. God’s merciful pardoning of sin is His ultimate demonstration of kindness.

It is good to remember and express these acts of kindness which God in His good providence has given to His people. That is especially true while living in the shadow of hurricane Helene. In hard times, people are tempted to think only of the tragedy. But Christians must remember the goodness and kindness of God which is experienced (and perhaps taken for granted) from day to day. Certainly it is easier to praise God when His providence provides for and protects you. It is easy to praise Him for His work of salvation. But there is much to be learned in the book of Job in giving thanks in all circumstances.

God’s Hard Providences

The tension in Job 2:9-10 is found in the conversation between Job and his wife. This family has just experienced a heart-wrenching tragedy. Their 10 children have been killed in a natural disaster, all their wealth is lost. But after his wife urges him to cut ties with God Job says: “Shall we receive good from God, and shall we not receive evil?”[6] What does Job mean when he says he receives “evil” from God?

From the rest of Scripture it is abundantly clear that God is not capable of doing evil. For example, James 1:13 says that “God cannot be tempted with evil, and he himself tempts no one.” That limits what Job might be saying. It cannot mean that he thinks God is behaving in an evil way toward him. The Bible says that interpretation is impossible. There is not any place for laying blame at God’s feet. The solution is not far away.

The Hebrew word translated “evil” in the ESV can also simply mean bad, or disaster. So it is not that God acts wickedly against Job in allowing this tragedy. Rather, the Bible is describing Job’s assessment of his circumstance. It does not seem far fetched at all that Job would describe his calamity as bad or a disaster. But the emphasis in Job is to teach the Christian how to respond properly when faced with a departure from the good times with which people are so familiar. It exhorts the reader to trust the Lord with all that happens in this life without judging the acceptability or fitness of His works. But that is not the only way that people respond to calamity. It is in Job’s exchange with his wife in Job 2:9-10 that the two basic responses to God’s hard providences are acted out.

Job’s wife acts in bitterness toward the Lord leading to what seems to be a rejection of Him. Many people are tempted to respond in this way. Job 2:9 records: “Then his wife said to him, ‘Do you still hold fast your integrity? Curse God and die.’” Job’s wife concludes that her calamity, which is truly and in all ways to be considered a tragedy, is too hard. It pushes her to think, at least for a season, that God is not worth her time. At this time, Job’s spiritual integrity is a joke to her and his life is even worthless to her. She urges her husband to curse God and die. Perhaps these words are simply the cry of a broken heart. We are not told if she changes her tune. However, even in her devastating circumstances she charges God with evil and elevates herself to being wiser than He. She presumes to know the final result better than God does. This same sentiment is expressed when people express anger against God over a certain difficulty they have witnessed or experienced. Such a response is basically the same as the emotional state of Job’s wife, and Job calls it “foolish.”

By way of contrast, Job acts in contentment, bearing up under what God has assigned to him. Job’s acceptance of God’s hard providences is, in some sense, mind-boggling. Some of Job’s statements as he suffers his ruin are truly breathtaking. When he looses all his possessions, status, and children in a matter of minutes, he says: “Naked I came from my mother’s womb, and naked shall I return. The LORD gave, and the LORD has taken away; blessed be the name of the LORD.”[7] I wonder how many Christians today would make such a statement. When the devil strikes covers him with festering blisters from head to toes, he says: “Shall we receive good from God, and shall we not receive evil?”[8] In both of these sayings, Job demonstrates a stunning and complete contentment with God’s providential ordering of his circumstances. And it is his acceptance of God’s working in his life that marks the lesson of Job. It is a lesson I have found myself needing to learn better as I have walked through the fairly minor inconvenience of the temporary loss of power, water, and mobility.

Application

In response to the Bible’s teaching on trusting God also in hard providences, I want to challenge Christians in two ways.

First, trust in the omniscience, and goodness of God. Especially in times of crisis, it is crucial for us to have the contentment of Job. If this man who suffered far more than most Christians ever have can praise God, the rest of the Church should be able to do so as well. That begins with a right assessment of the One who orders His creation. Man’s understanding of any event is limited. His knowledge takes only a small slice of what he is taught and experiences over a span of eighty years. But God is omniscient, meaning that He knows all things. There is no mystery to Him, nothing where He does not know the outcome. That makes Him trustworthy. He is good, meaning that He does not deal with His people for their destruction, but only for their building up. Who is man to make a final assessment of what good things the Lord will bring to him even in his hardship. From personal hardship, the deprivations caused by the hurricane have helped me. They have shown me my great reliance on Him, helped me see my own weakness, caused me to recalibrate my priorities. And He may have other plans besides the ones I recognize. But whatever His reason for hurricane Helene, He is wiser than any man and good in all His dealings. Therefore the Christian’s default should be to trust Him, and be content.

Second, rehearse the many great gifts God has given. Christians should keep themselves from being overwhelmed with the troubles of today by looking to the many instances of God’s kindness. Rehearse together how He has given life and health. Consider how many things could have gone wrong but did not. Reflect on the fragility of life and how the Lord has yet preserved His people these many days.

The reason people who are minimally affected by the effects of this hurricane are prone to grumble is because they have had a very comfortable life up to this point. That is not to make light of the devastation faced by communities and families in the Southeast. Their grief is justified. However, for the vast majority of people, their temporary loss of power, gasoline, and drinking water does not compare to the many good gifts the Lord has given them.

Finally, consider the greatness God’s work of salvation. He sent His Son to be the propitiation of sin. That means His Son was sent to satisfy the wrath of God over sin committed against Him. On the cross the Lord Jesus Christ bore God’s wrath. Whatever is endured in this life cannot be compared to that agony. Christ bore the infinite wrath of God. His Father forsook Him, turning His face away so that His people would not taste the agony of hell. He has done that for the good of His people. It is the greatest gift anyone might ever receive. That gospel truth is to be believed and rejoiced in. It is that perspective that helps people endure the hard providences God brings their way.

Conclusion

I do not think I will ever forget hurricane Helene. I think it will change how I respond to reports of storms for the rest of my life. But Christian, be reminded that the Lord is good, and the Lord is sovereign. Because He rules and reigns, the Christian says with Job: “The Lord gives and takes away…” Because the world is subject to God’s providence, the Christian’s grumbling should be changed to Job’s good confession: “Shall we receive good from God, and shall we not receive evil?” That does not mean that hardships are not hard anymore. It does not mean that loss does not bring about tears. But it does mean that whether facing easy or hard circumstances, Christians are to give thanks to God, praise His name, tell of His salvation, and rejoice for His steadfast love endures forever.

[1] Westminster Shorter Catechism #11.

[2] Psalm 16:6 (ESV).

[3] Job 1:10.

[4] Ephesians 2:1.

[5] Ephesians 2:3.

[6] Job 2:10.

[7] Job 1:21.

[8] Job 2:10.

Belief about God, Christian Living, Love for God

Responding to Hurricane Helene – Part 1

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I have never been one to pay particularly close attention to storms. I have always lived in places where the threat of them was more significant than the actual event. Sure, I have lived through major snow storms, tornado warnings and landings, ice storms that cut off power and conveniences for a day. But all of that changed on September 27, 2024. There had been some rain the day before. That is what I was used to in Augusta, GA. Hurricanes and Tropical Storms would vent their fury on places further south, and we would have to put up with a day of fairly heavy rain. So I had assumed that would be all: some rain on Thursday, but on Friday everything would continue as per normal. But I was mistaken.

At around 3 a.m. on the 27th I woke up aware that someone was moving around downstairs. Noticing my wife missing from the bed, I went to find out what she was doing. I could hear the rain and gusts of wind, but it did not seem too significant to me. I went and checked on her and finding everything ok, I returned to get some more sleep. One hour later I woke up to find a living room full of Gleasons, alarmed at the noise of the wind and rain pelting the house. I encouraged them to be productive with their time if they were going to be up (yes, I’m that kind of dad), and again returned to get some more sleep. One hour later I woke up because I could feel the house shifting as the gusts of wind whistled outside the windows. At this point, unwilling to die by myself on the second floor, I made it downstairs and sat in the dark (power was out and would not be restored for almost 5 days) with the rest of the family. By God’s grace the storm may have raged but the damage to our house was minimal. The same cannot be said for many others.

When the dawn broke and we were able to go and assess the damage, it was like a war zone. Trees were down everywhere around the city, in some instances having crushed houses and cars. Traffic lights did not work anywhere making every intersection dangerous and challenging. Almost no houses had electricity, and there was no prediction as to when it would be restored. Cell phone service was spotty making the ability to communicate with our church family tricky.

The following Sunday, September 29, little had changed. People had helped each other remove fallen trees and other debris, but the infrastructure was not restored. In fact, the situation became more challenging for many Augusta residents because the Utilities Department decided to shut off water to all houses. Food was beginning to rot in refrigerators, gasoline was beginning to run out, and people were beginning to become very concerned, and even tense. So how is the Christian to address such a situation. As the members of Cliffwood (who were able to get to the church) gathered, we considered together the lessons God’s word gives us from Job 2:9-10:

“Then his wife said to him, ‘Do you still hold fast your integrity? Curse God and die.’ But he said to her, ‘You speak as one of the foolish women would speak. Shall we receive good from God, and shall we not receive evil?’ In all this Job did not sin with his lips.”

Context of Job 2:9-10

This snippet of a conversation between a husband and wife has a context. The reader is not just overhearing some terse words exchanged because of the strain and stress of an average day. Job and his wife have just been completely ruined.

From Job 1:1-5 it is clear that Job is a very wealthy man with a large family. The accounting of his possessions are foreign to a modern North American, but his 7,000 sheep, 3,000 camels, 500 yoke of oxen, 500 female donkeys, and many servants establish Job as “the greatest of all the people of the east.” (Job 1:3). In addition, he is reported to have seven sons and three daughters (Job 1:2). Job is at the top of the pile, but in a very short space of time he is reduced to nothing through catastrophe and disaster.

In Job 1:13-19, four different reports come to him. The first report is that all his oxen and donkeys were stolen by the Sabeans (v. 14-15). The second report tells of fire burning up Job’s sheep and attending servants (v. 16). The third announces that the camels and attending servants have been stolen by the Chaldeans (v. 17). And the fourth, and most tragic, is that all 10 of Job’s children have been killed when the house in which they are visiting with each other collapses (v. 18-19). What is even more catastrophic is that these reports come to Job one after another. While the current report is given to Job, the next messenger arrives (see v. 16, 17, & 18), where the narrator records that while the messenger was still speaking the next messenger arrived. That means that Job loses his wealth, status, and all his children in a matter of minutes. And that would be tragic enough, and yet Job endures more.

Starting in Job 2:1-6, Job also loses his health. It says that Job was struck with “loathsome sores from the sole of his foot to the crown of his head.” (Job 2:7). This once-great man went from being the greatest man in the east to sitting in the ash heap, scraping himself with a piece of pottery to gain some relief from his festering blisters. And what is truly stunning in it all is the way in which these hardships came to Job and his family.

Job was thus afflicted as the result of two meetings between God and the devil. The first is recorded in Job 1:6-12, and the second in Job 2:1-6. In each meeting, God praises Job for his faithfulness, but the devil suggests that Job serves the Lord because he has privilege. Each time the devil asks God for permission to afflict His faithful servant. And perhaps astonishingly to us who have but a limited understanding of God’s good plans, He grants Satan’s request. In the first meeting Satan is permitted attack Job’s possessions and in the second his health. And yet, this account is not about how a man handles circumstances well. Job is the account of how a man is content when God brings what William Cowper calls a “frowning providence” in his hymn God Moves in a Mysterious Way.

Next it is left to determine just what forms God’s providence can take and how Christians should respond to it.